My Fitness Pal

I was surprised yesterday by a message from my food diary app. I have used it for 365 days straight. I credit that app with helping me lose 70 pounds last year and keeping it off for 7 months now.

It can be very difficult to lose weight if you don't know the calorie value of what you are eating. If you are guessing, you are probably way low – that’s why we progressively add weight. Some people try extreme exercise, hoping that that will help. Others try fad diets or think there are foods they can never eat again. That doesn’t work in the long term either. I have written in other blog posts of the need for a lifestyle change so I won’t repeat that here.

My Fitness Pal is the app I use. It is available for most phone platforms or you can use their website. I use it on an IPod Touch. It is completely free. It is also very easy to use and only takes a few minutes of time each day to track what you have eaten or what you are thinking of eating. I have been spared from many high calorie meals by looking up foods before I eat them.

Here is the link to the MyFitnessPal website where you can set up an account and get the apps. All of the data syncs between app and website so you can enter info in either.

You can also track exercise in the app and get a realistic picture of how many calories are burned. This is an important part of weight loss too. If I walk 30 minutes at a very brisk pace I will burn between 160 and 180 calories. If I ride my bike very hard for an hour at 14 mph I will burn about 500.

Well I hope what I have learned in my weight loss journey will help you be successful in yours.

Here is a link to other posts about my weight loss journey.

Philip

Grief

It comes in waves; it settles in layers. It brings pain, sorrow and sadness.

Today was a day of celebration that turned to sadness. My son Matthew turned 13 today. We celebrated him being a part of out family.

Then my 23 year old daughter, one who could be called a prodigal, brings news that tears the joy out of me. She is one who pursued God with a passion. Then came bad company; the kind that Scripture says corrupts good morals. It was a spectacular slide downward. She abandoned her husband of 1 ½ years and took up with an infidel. Her whole life changed.

On the way down she joined the company of those who call themselves “childless by choice.” Yes, this from a lady who so loved children and would be an amazing mother. But caught by the snare of the world, the one that says there is so much more than the blessing of children. Money, possessions and fun were to be chased after.

So the news of today: Some health issues I won’t go into but leading her to a hysterectomy. This bad news for a 23 year old, my young daughter and one I love but feel so far from.

And she says it’s all okay, no big deal, didn’t want kids anyway. But is a rock thrown into a pond with no ripples? The ones that hit me feel like a tsunami. Is a curse come upon her; the one called barrenness? Oh I know that is such archaic language; and such archaic thought. Yes in a society that no longer values children in the Biblical way.

I grieve for my young daughter even if she can’t or won’t or maybe will at some time later. And to be honest, I grieve for me. Yes, this will affect me and my wife and the legacy we had hoped for.

And I will pray for something else. I pray for her heart to soften, to be broken by the gentle hand of God that it may be made tender like His once again and that she will return to Him. And I pray that she will not have such a final thing happen to her. That she and the news will change. There is so much being lost now in the place where she dwells.

Will you hurt with me for this wandering lamb? Will you now say a prayer for her? Thanks.

Philip

Fear

Bandit

We have a dog that is full of fear. We got him from the pound. Who knows what happened in his life before he came to our home.

When I walk I take Bandit with me. He knows when I am getting ready and gets all excited. Sometimes he is disappointed when he finds out I am going on a bike ride. I look the same for both. The clue is I either get the leash or water bottles.

It's on the walks that I recognized his fears. He will see someone or something and his pace changes, he slinks down and I have to encourage him along. It used to seem funny to me.

One of Bandit's bad habits is barking at the mailman. Some people around the house have said he is being protective. On our walks I have noticed that when we encounter a mailman he becomes especially fearful.

With some things I have read recently and some work I am doing in my own life a light went on. I think the reason he freaks out about the mailman is not because he is being protective but because he is terrified.

I see the same thing in my life. Certain experiences have led to various fears in my life and those fears help cause me to react in wrong ways.

I have fears about being abandoned. I have fears of relationships ending. I am just discovering how these fears influence my behavior. An example: why go to all the work of trying to build relationships with other men when they are just going to fall apart? And why would someone want to be my friend anyway?

So I am terrified and barking at the mailman.

Glad to hear your thoughts on either me or Bandit.

Philip

Procrastination

What if my procrastination led to the death of some of my friends and family? That is a question I had to deal with this week.

Procrastination is one of my sins. That's not saying that putting off things is sinful but in my case sometimes it is. There are many things I do not do when they need to be done. In my misplaced priorities I get certain things accomplished I want to do each day while other more important things are not.

On our car the brake rotors were warped and needed to be replaced. It was a job I was going to do with supervision. The weeks and months went by as I always hoped for a better or more convenient time. The brakes worked okay; just a rumbling stop sometimes.

Well last weekend two friends, my son and I were coming back from a retreat near Woodland Park. It was a 90 mile drive, mostly on the highway at 75 mph. After dropping the two friends off, we soon noticed something was wrong. There was a strange noise and then another. We investigated but couldn't find the source. I drove on and soon my brakes went spongy. I pulled over and we looked for fluid leaks or something else. I decided to drive home slowly. After about a mile there was a grinding noise. Now it was apparent: a wheel bearing on the front was bad. Bad is too mild a word. It was seized and had almost burned and ground the retaining bolt away. If that had happened, the wheel would have come off.

All of a sudden, there was an incredible sense of protection. This catastrophic failure could have happened at a much less convenient place or it could have happened at 75 miles an hour. It could have been a fatal accident.

A sense of chastisement came: my stupid procrastination! Look at what almost happened. Over and over in my mind I replayed what happened and what could have happened. The car was at the repair shop Monday and Tuesday; it gave me a lot of time to think.

I was let off the hook a little when the mechanic told me that the brake rotor problem probably didn't cause the bearing problem. But I also knew that if the brake job had been done sooner then maybe the bearing would have been replaced or at least lubed better.

So did I learn my lesson?  I will confess that I probably have not. Sure I will be more sensitive to brake issues in the future but my sin is much deeper than that.

I am learning something from the Samson Society meetings I go to. Here is the first step of the path I am learning to walk: ...I surrender to God in simple faith - making no promises but merely asking for His aid. So I know it will do no good to promise that I will never procrastinate again or to resolve to do better. I am a broken, messed up guy who needs God's help. I need a power that doesn't reside in me. I have no bootstraps to pull up.

I also have confessed my sin to other people. I admit that I need the strength of community and I want to break the power that secret sin has.

I also feel foolish. Isn't it ridiculous that I can't be better motivated or better organized so the to-do list gets done in a timely manner? That is where I need God's help. I need Him to help me do what is important. I need him and others to bring the resources that will help in that process. What I need is not more of me.

So this is my story and my confession. I am not victorious. I can't talk of the way I used to be. This is me right now. I trust God's grace and power will come into my life and make the changes that need to happen.

I would be glad to hear your input, especially if you have dealt with this sin yourself.

Philip